Wario Town

Ok so, this morning my brain apparently confused LazyTown with Wario.

I never watched that show, all I ever saw is like two or three screenshots of it scattered across tumblr. Apparently, from my brief glance at Wikipedia today, it was a pretty cool thing with actually crazy high production values for a silly kids’ edutainment thing.

But because I have crazy dreams, my brain just kinda decided Blue Pilot Homestar Runner was actually Blue Wario and his friend was Waluigi (literally Waluigi; also, Blue Wario notably had a bold Waluigi moustache). It was time once again the bad marios needed a scheme to raise a little cash, so Blue Wario had come up with this idea to turn everyone into fancy houses and sell them.

Things transitioned to this not-quite-isometric perspective view where as they zapped some peripheral friend of theirs (not a friend any more I guess) she turned into a house, shown in a cutaway view with this blueprint grid. So far so good! However, as their cursor left the scene to go zap more people into houses, the camera remained focused on the house. Apparently, the gears in its mind were turning right now. Something about the houseifying ray had changed its nature, and it now had a new agenda to attend to.

As the bad marios’ cursor was focusing on another house, suddenly, another cursor briefly appeared out of nowhere at the top of the house and fired its own houseifying ray—this created an expansion at the top of the house (maybe a big elaborate chimney, maybe a stairwell with a small room sitting on top; it was hard to tell which with the low resolution of the grid). The first house they’d houseified was now on a runaway mission to upgrade houses, as it assumed was what they wanted. And they didn’t know what to do.

Soon the first house took over the camera, and started going from house to house. First it upgraded the houses with nonsensical upward expansions, and then it turned its ray toward the residents in them. For some reason these residents were anthros? It was like, showing them as random animals was part of the style of the blueprint grid screen. Anyway, instead of houseifying them, the house’s upgrade ray just extended them upward, illustrated by one resident shown as a giraffe sporting a really long neck extending up into the house upgrade. Because of the stylisation of the grid view was only slightly wider around than they were.

The house went all the way around a couple blocks with its cursor upgrading houses and residents like crazy. A frame/screen with a dark blue background summarised the results of this, showing about sixteen residents in a regularly-spaced rectangle; for some reason they were illustrated as fat and a little grotesque-looking with a teardrop shape to them instead of really tall (probably to save space), but they were bigger than the one or two regularly-sized people put in there for scale.

This was very clearly not what the bad marios wanted, but the dream ended before there could be any resolution.